He answered!!!

Several days ago - Tuhan menjawab doaku.

Doa yang menjadi pergumulan terhebatku selama lebih dari 2 tahun terakir.
Pergumulan yang merebut sukacita dan damai sejahteraku .. yang membuatku sulit bobo (padahal aku ini keboo abis) --
Pergumulan yang membuatku merasa kalo aku tidak berarti - jauh dari spesial..
Pergumulan yang brings the worst out of me - aku berusaha keras, frustasi ~ tuk membuktikan aku benar.
Pergumulan yang membuatku kecewa dan tidak dicintai (or tepatnya, kurang dicintai...) ~ tidak ada yang membelaku.. tidak dimengerti..tidak dipercaya..
Pergumulan yang sejujurnya - sudah aku lepaskan .... "apa yang terjadi, terjadilah ... aku sudah lelah berdoa dan berjuang tuk hal ini...." 

Tapi Allahku yang mengasihiku lebih dari siapapun TERNYATA ........ selalu mendengar doaku ....
dan Dia menjawab!!!!! SEMUANYA - pada timing yang perfect.

Apa reaksiku ketika doaku terjawab??!!
*untuk erlyn yg normal - seharusnya adalah "YAAAAAYYYYY!!!!! :D :D :D"

But this time,
Aku terdiam ... dan lemas. (bukan lemas sedih, tapi lemas seperti orang yang habis berperang mati2an) ..
Aku yang "beneraaaaann? ini nyata kaaah?" 


Selama 2 tahun terakir, aku selalu berasa kalo aku tertindas - sendiri berjuang... sudah mengeluarkan segenap air mata, sakit hatiku demi peperangan ini..
dan now I realized... kalo He has been there selama ini .. aku ga pernah sendiri..

He is truly my defender..

Bahkan ketika aku ga tau lagi harus berdoa apa... He heard my crying heart.
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. - Romans 8:26 


Aku ga berjuang sendiri ... He was the one who fought for me
For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory - Deut 20:4 


He listened every single word - I've ever said to Him .. bahkan yang udah aku totally lupa apa yg pernah aku minta ~

Aku ga pernah menangis parah ketika nulis blog .. :$ :$ but this time, air mataku tidak berhenti mengalir ...
sungguh ini tangis kemenangan ... kemenangan yang sepenuhnya anugrah ~
Karena Dia yang berjuang untukku (ketika aku sepenuhnya tidak berdaya) ... dan Dia menyerahkan medali itu untukku ..
Simply because He loves me and
because He wants to say this message "You can always count on Me, eyn ~ I will fight for you"


In all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. - Romans 8:37

Dear precious friends.... our Father is faithful ~ He answers our prayers.
He did answer mine!!! bahkan ketika aku udah gave up ..
He alone is enough ..

Let me share this "Blessings" to you ..
it's a very beautiful song ~ :')
dimanapun - apapun yang kau hadapi saat ini, remember a very simple thing - He is there for you - He listens to you - dan terlebih, He will fight for you - like He did for me..
Yes - terkadang manusia bisa mengecewakanmu, tapi Tuhan tidak akan pernah!
Be blessed :')

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CSVqHcdhXQ&feature=share


We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love is way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt your goodness, we doubt your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not our home

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise




"But you, Lord, are a shield around me,
my glory, the One who lifts my head high. 
I call out to the Lord, 
and he answers me from his holy mountain." -psalm-

Love (PRAYER) is in the Air

Love is in the air <3

I remember -- this week 13 years ago -- jaman2 masi smp - how I was so excited welcoming valentine's day! Seminggu sblm valentine's day, dah ngestok cukup banyak coklat -- and after vday, lebih full lagi di kulkas (got plenty, yay!!) --

and this year, me and 2 other girlfriends (one is married, one is getting married this year) are having a dinner on vday!! WAIT!! We aren't celebrating vday! we are celebrating my friend's bday on vday! Her bday was actually early of Feb, we are having it tomorrow - because WE KINDA FORGOT TOMORROW IS VALENTINE'S DAY!

I was like, "seriously? kita dah kayak jomblooo neh!" but, yeah, we are having dinner anyway tmrw, walaupun our resto was fully booked already (ya iyalah, duh! valentine, lyn!)

For me personally, tho ~ it's not that I don't celebrate vday -- tapi karena my beloved man nun jauh dsana ... Well, at least, I was thinking - at least I would give him a valentine gift (psstt..! don't tell him!!! I haven't told him yet!) -- tapi sejujurnya, ini membuatku berpikir "duh belum merit aja dah ga semangat rayain vday -- gmana the rest of our marriage life niiiih?" ----- gimana coba ga semangat kasi gifts? at least, chocolate!!!

-- walaupun fyi, my love language (and his love language) is quality time and words (so - buat kami, harusnya aman2 saja -- haha) tapi tetep!!! let's give some gifts, don't u think?

Talking about gifts...

Barusan aku baca devotional .. "Prayer Can Change a Marriage"

intinya begini .. sering kali kita ngomong "well, i guess the only thing left to do is pray" or mungkin bahasa gaulnya =

"hmmm, kayanya JALAN TERAKIR HANYA BERDOA deh!"

Are u familiar with this sentence, dear?

OH! I do say it a lot!! shame on me!

Is there something wrong with this sentence, dear?

YES!! BIG WRONG! kenapa berdoa adalah jalan terakir? PRAYING SHOULD BE THE FIRST THING WE DO! Berdoa harus menjadi jalan pertama - yang kita tempuh ..

and for me, aku jadi terpikir -- kalo PRAYER IS actually THE BEST GIFT WE COULD GIVE!

again, ironically kita sering banget bilang ... "gue CUMA bisa doain lu!"

Doa bukan CUMA! Doa is super cool ~~!!

God’s answers to prayer healed the sick, fed the hungry, stopped the rain, kept the earth from revolving on its axis for an hour, divided the Red Sea, poured forth water from a rock, opened wombs, confused enemies, opened jail doors, made leprous skin brand new, caused the lame to dance, gave courage to the fearful, and raised the dead. Jesus said, “if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain ‘Move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you,” (Matthew 17:20 NIV).

So, my friends.. I am not saying that -- horaaayyy - mulai skrg, ga perlu kasi gifts apa2 ke our beloved ones -- cukup doa cukup doa! murah!!! Kalo itu alasannya, again it's a BIG WRONG!

Tapi mari -- on this vday, let us see this way .. pray more for someone you love!! and jadikan doa sebagai hadiah terindah yg kita bisa constantly give to them dalam segala kondisi (bahkan ketika kita sedang geram! the good news is, it’s hard to stay mad at someone when you’re praying for him or her) ..

Mari kita tidak hanya sekedar sibuk celebrate hari kasih sayang dengan romantic dinner atopun great gifts, tapi mari terlebih sibuk merayakan dengan berdoa 'tuk orang2 terkasih :)

--------------------------------------

To my beloved man,

Selamat hari kasih sayang!! Selamat hari aku sayang kamu, kamu sayang aku - dan kita sayang orang lain!!!

Walaupun this vday we're not together (like last year) and I haven't given you any gifts .. I thank God for a very beautiful reminder, that I am to pray for you! It's a beautiful gift that I commit to give it to you 'til the rest of my life. I love you!!

Sambil aku persiapkan my vday gift to you .. look forward to it, plis! ;p

*ini doa contekan, tapi I think ini nyontek yg bagus :$

----

Lord, I pray for my man, from head to toe:

• His Head –That he will look to You as Lord of his life. (1 Corinthians 11:13)
• His Mind - That he will have the mind of Christ and think as the Holy Spirit would lead him and not the flesh. (1 Corinthians 2:16)
• His Eyes –That You will keep his eyes from temptation and that he will turn his eyes from sin. (Matthew 6:13, Mark 9:47)

• His Ears - That he will hear Your still small voice instructing him. (1 Kings 19:12, Psalm 32:8)
• His Mouth – That his words will be pleasing to You. (Psalm 19:14)
• His Neck –That he will humble himself before You and be strong, courageous, and careful to do everything written in Your Word so that he will be prosperous and successful. (James 4:10, Joshua 1:8-9)
• His Heart-That he will love and trust You with his whole heart. (Deuteronomy 6:5, Proverbs 3:5)
• His Arms-That You will be his strength. (Psalm 73:26)
• His Hands-That he will enjoy the work of his hands and see it as a gift from You. (Ecclesiastes 3:13, 5:19)
• His feet – That You will order his steps and that he will walk in Your truth. (Proverbs 4:25, Psalm 26:3)

And help me, Lord, to be a woman of love and prayer. Amen!

-----------------------------------------

Happy Valentine's Day all!! Prayer is in the air <3

1 Thessalonians 5:17 = Never Stop PRAYING

From Purpose Driven Life.com = Keep on Praying

"Why be persistent? How come my answers sometimes don't come immediately? Why should I keep on praying when the answer doesn't come in my time table?"

Keep on praying when there's no answer, because persistent praying helps me focus on God. God wants me to remember that He alone is the source of my answers to prayer.

The Bible says in Philippians 4:19, "And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."

God wants us to see Him alone as the source of our needs.When we have to pray about something over and over, who do we look to? We look to the Lord. Persistent prayer focuses our attention. Have you discovered that we like to look to everybody else to solve our problem except the Lord? We look to our friends, we look to our family, we look to counselors, we look to the government, we look to anybody -- except the Lord. God often delays an answer to force you to focus on Him.

Persistent praying also clarifies my requests. A delayed answer a lot of times gives me time to clarify what do I really want. Time separates deep longings from mere whims. I've prayed for things and sometimes during the delay decided I didn't really want them after all.

God delays the answer to test you. It's not that He doesn't want to give it to you, He wants to know if you really want it. Do you want it enough to keep praying? Jeremiah 29:13 "You will seek me and find me when you seek for me with all your heart." Nothing worthwhile is accomplished with half-hearted prayers.

Persistent prayer will prepare me for the answer. God usually wants to do more than you are praying for. Surprise! God wants to do it greater and He needs time to get you ready for it. There are changes God wants to make in you. Ephesians 3:20 "Now glory be to God, who by his mighty power at work within us, is able to do far more than we would ever dare to ask or even dream of infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires, thoughts, or hopes."

People say, "Prayer changes things." Of course we know it is God who does the changing. But prayer changes you. And God is more interested in you than He is in circumstances. Often as soon as you've made the change in your life the doors of heaven open and the answer comes. Expect a miracle.

Persistent praying strengthens and develops your faith. A mark of maturity is how long can you wait. Galatians 6:9 "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." God’s saying, "Hang on! Be patient! The harvest is coming. Don't give up! Look up!"