Showing posts with label worries. Show all posts
Showing posts with label worries. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World



by Joanna Weaver.
- a book for you who wants to live a balanced life. To please God with your intimacy with Him and bless people with your service. - eyn

Jesus is our supreme example. He was never in a hurry. He knew who he was and where he was going. He wasn’t held hostage to the world’s demands or even its desperated needs. “I only do what the Father tells me to do.”

Two completely different women undergo a transformaton right before our eyes; a holy makeover. The bold one becomes meek, the mild one courageous. For it is impossible to be in the presence of Jesus and not bechanged.

We can get caught in the same performance trap, feeling as though we must prove our love for God by doing great things for him.

The Kingdom of God, you see, is a paradox. While the world applauds achievement, God desires companionship. The world clamors, “Do more! Be all that you can be!” But our Father whispers, “Be still and know that I am God.”

When we first spend time in his presence – when we take time to hear his voice – God provides the horsepower we need to pull the heaviest load. He saddles up Grace and invites us to take a ride.

The only thing that came out between sobs was a broken plea, “Tell me the good news........... I honestly can’t remember.... “ perhaps you have felt the same way. You’ve known the Lord your whole life and yet you haven’t found the peace and fulfillment you’ve always longed for.

Matthew 11:28-29

While Martha may have been the first person to ask Jesus the question, “Lord, dont you care?” she definitely wasn’t the last. We’ve all felt the loneliness, the frustration, the left-out-ness and resentment she experienced in the kitchen that Bethany afternoon – doing all that work for others when no one seems to notice and no one seems to care.

That’s what i want when i’m feeling overwhelmed: soft, soothing words and plenty of helpful action.

“What you are doing is not good. You will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone.” Exodus 18:17-18

“But even pure ministry for Jesus can become a weight we drag around....it’s called the ‘treadmill’ anointing’, and it isn’t from God”. –Dutch Sheets-

It’s easy to find a shady spot and feel sorry for ourselves when we’re distracted and discouraged. Especially when we run up against unexpected opposition. Especially when it feels like we’re running for our lives.

When we’re distracted and discouraged, tired and overwhelmed, there is no better place to go than to our Father. He alone has what we need. As you do, you’ll find healing for your hurting heart.

Five strategies for fighting discouragement.
1.Allow for rest stops
2.Get a new point of view
3.Have patience
4.Mingle
5.Set the timer

What is it about us women that creates such a desperate need in us to always “know”, to always “understand”? We want an itinerary for our life, and when God doesn’t immediately produce one, we set out to write our own.

I love the compassion of Jesus in this story. He saw Martha’s situation. He
understood her complaint. But he loved her too much to give her what she wanted. Instead, Jesus gave her what she needed – an invitation to draw cloes to him. With open arms, he invited the troubled woman to leave her worries and cares and find refuge in him alone.

Because when you have questions, there is no better place to go than to the One who has the answers.

“Worry is allowing problems and distress to come between us and the heart of God. It is the view that God has somehow lost control of the situation and we cannot trust Him. A legitimate concern presses us closer to the heart of God and causes us to lean and trust on Him all the more.” – Gary E Gilley –

“Any concern too small to be turned intro a prayer is too small to be made into a burden.” –Corrie Ten Boom-

Eyn, eyn ..do not let your heart be trouble. Trust in God. Trust also in Me. John 14:1

Now, this is what the Lord Almighty says: “Give careful thought to your ways.” Haggai 1:5

I realized then that, while there are many things that need to be done, things i’m capable of doing and want to do, i am not always the one to do them. Even if i have a burden for a certain need or project, my interest or concern is not a surefire design that i need to be in charge. God may only be calling me to pray that the right person will rise up to accomplish it. What’s more, i may be stealing someone else’s blessing when i assume i must do it all.

Make no mistake. Satan enjoys using our hectic schedules, stressed bodies, and emotional upsets in his efforts to put up barriers to our intimacy with God. That’s why we need to take a close look at any thought, feeling, or activity that diminishes our appetite for intimacy with God.

If you’re having a little trouble feeling close to God – or even wanting to draw close – you might want to consider what activities you are using to fill the empty places of your life. What’s taking the edge off your hunger for him?

Service without spirituality is exhausting and hopeless. But in the same respect, spirituality without service is barren and selfish. We need to unite the two and do it all "as unto the Lord".

When we do that, something wonderful happens to our work in the Kitchen. Sinks turn into sanctuaries. Mops swab holy ground. And daily chores that used to bore us or wore us down become opportunities to express our gratitude - selfless avenues for his grace.

Our sanctification, does not depend upon changing our works, but in doing that for God's sake which we commonly do for our own.

Jesus seems to do nothing of Himself which He can possibly delegate to His creatures. He commands us to do slowly and blunderingly what He could do perfectly and in the twinkling of an eye." - cs lewis -

Instead of expecting God to acquiesce to our plans, dreams, schemes - or frantically trying to impress him with our efforts on his behalf - we simply need to "watch to see where God is working and join Him"

Duty gets offended quickly if it isn't appreciated, but love learns to laugh a lot and to work for sheer joy of doing it.

"True love hurts. It always has to hurt. If you really love one another, you will not be able to avoid making sacrifies." Mother Teresa

Everyone starts at the same place - at the most humble point of service. But when you're truly a servant, a job title and a position are completely secondary. You're willing to do whatever needs to be done.

Working from out God-given gifts releases ministry potential in greater measure and helps the various members of the body work harminiously.

Rather than picking and choosing ministry opportunities based solely on our talents and interests. We are directed 'always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord'. -jack hoey

When we surrender ourselves ourselves to be used by God, we don't always get to pick the time, the method, or the place of ministry. In fact, sometimes, we may find ourselves doing nothing at all - except praying and waiting for God's leading.

A true passion for God will naturally reesult in compassion for people. We can't love the Father without also being willing to love his kids - even when they're less than lovable.

Checking your motives - Jan Johnson
1. Am I serving to impress anyone?
2. Am I serving to receive external rewards?
3. Is my service affected by moods and whims (my own as well as others)?
4. Am I using this service to feel good about myself?
5. Am I using my service to muffle God's voice demanding I change?

Because if our Kitchen Service doesn't point people to Jesus, we risk becoming surrogate messiahs. If we, not God, end up being their source of hope, we are setting them up for profound dissapointment and ourselves for profound burnout - because we, in ourselves, are simply not up to the task of saving the world. In ourselves, like peter and john at the gate called Beautiful, we have nothing to offer. But in Christ, we are given the power to give people what they most desperately need.

I want my relationship with God to be so real and vital, so like that of the apostles Peter and John, that people can't help but sit up and take notice.

All the things I'd been trying to accomplish were important, but I had lost my center. Busy being busy, I'd forgotten to tend to my inner self, the spiritual me. Like a wheel without an axle, I'd careened through life, bouncing off one duty and onto another.

Life is filled with Hula-Hoops. We all have responsibilites, important things that need our attention. If we're not careful, however, our hearts and our minds can be consumed with the task of keeping them in the air. Rather than centering ourselves in Christ and letting the other elements of our lives take their rightful place around the center, we end up shifting our attention from one important to-do item to another, to frantically trying to keep them all in motion.

It's easy to forget that while there is a time to work, there is also a time to worship -- and it's the worship, the time we spend with God, that provides the serene center to a busy, complex life.

We will all have trials. The question is not when the pressure will come, but where the pressure will lie. Will it come between us and the Lord? Or will it press us closer to His breast? - hudson taylor

Life works better when we know how to glance at things but gaze at God. Seeing Him clearly will enable us to see all other things clearly. - selwyn hughes

It is so easy to lose focus in life, to lose our center. Life conspires to drag eyes away from the face of the Savior, hypnotizing us with the unending swat of our problems.

First things first, the Lord was saying. Take care of my business, and I'll take care of yours. Make room in your heart of me, and I'll make room for everything else.

The very definition of sin is separation from God. So no matter how important the activity, no matter how good it seems, if I use it as an excuse to hold God at arm's length, it is sin.

Sometimes we have to slow down in order to take spiritual inventory and see where we stand with God. Sometimes we have to realize how empty we are before we're willing to be filled.

My personal times of devotion were erratic at best. My prayer life was quirky, my reading of the word was sporadic. And because I was not spending regular quite time with God, I was not putting myself in a position to be filled and refilled.

I didn't have to wait until I felt spiritual to spend time with God. I just had to make a decision of the will, and the spiriutal feelings would eventually come around.
On those crazy loopy days when I don't feel so "hoopy", I'm learning to reach for the Lord instead of chocolate chip sedatives. I'm learning how to leave the kitchen and head for the living room where Jesus waits, because that's where I'll find everything I need and everything I want. What I really need is more and more of the Master himself

Faith is about how you live your life in the meantime, how you make decisions when you dont know for sure what’s next. What you do with yourself between the last time you heard from God and the next time you hear from God is the ongoing challenge of a life of faith. –CeCe Winans – On a Positive Note.

There are times in every life when God writes the end to a chapter, when he asks us to say good-bye to something or someone who has been important to us. It might be a spouse, a parent, or friend. It might be a job we’ve loved, a city we’ve enjoyed, a prejudice or an assumption that we’ve always thought wes true.

Endings, in a sense, are inevitable. Dead ends, failed possibilities, and brick walls will dissapoint us all. And when toses endings come, we can fight them as Peter adivsed Jesus. Or we can accept them as Jesus did, as coming from the Father’s hand.

Let go one piece at a time. Sometimes we cling to control because we fear we’ll be asked to make drastic changes we’re not ready for. But God, in his kindness, takes us at a pace we can handle. If we simply obey what he asks of us at the moment, he’ll lead us the next step when we’re ready.

Martha thought she had value because she was productive. Jesus wanted her to learn she had value simply because she was his.

And being teachable, in essence, involves three things:
-Being willing to listen
-Acting on what we hear
-Responding to discipline

Obedience is an essential ingredient in intimacy with God and the key to having a Mary heart. Either we take Jesus’ words to heart and change, or we listen but disregard them. And to disregard the voice of God is worse than not listening at all. Especially if we say we love him.

All God’s revelations are sealed until they are opened to us by obedience. Obey God in the thing He shows you, and instantly the next thing is opened up.. God will never reveal more truth about himsefl until you have obeyed what you know already. –Oswald Chambers

Our loving Father will do whatever it takes to break that rebellion before that rebellion breaks us. Eve it means giving us a time-out (like having to wait for something we’ve wanted), taking away our toys (like the new computer that just crashed), or allowing some affliction to come our way.

If we find ourselves becoming critical of other people, we should stop examining them, and start ecamining ourselves. -
William Barclay

At the same time, it's important to remember that saying yes to God doesn't mean saying yes to everything! When our lives are overbooked, it's easy for us to become spiritually dry and undernourished. We can barely hear God's voice above the busy noise, let alone say yes to what he is asking. In this case, we do need to learn how to say no, but only so we are able to say yes to God when he wants to give us an assignment.

It's a great release to know that the secret to 'doing it all' is not necessarily 'doing it all' but rather discovering which part of the 'all' he has given us to do and doing all of that. -Jill Briscoe

It's increasingly hard to resist the temptation to use the Sabbath as a catch-up day instead of a day of worship and rest.

How does she keep a balance? I asked her not long ago. "It takes a ruthless commitment to first thing first. I am constantly having to ask the Lord to do the Psalm 139 thing on me: "Live in my heart. Search and examine me. Know my heart."

"Take my struggles and use them for your glory. Change me. Give me a Mary heart in my Martha world."
And with those words would come a quiteness, an awareness that the Lord was working. I began to realize that if I was yoked to Christ, then I could trust him to set the pace. He knew what I needed and what had to be done. I could trust him to accomplish what he'd started. My part was sto partner with him. So I'd get up from prayer and go back working and waiting some more.

I fear our generation has come dangerously near the "I'm - getting - tired - so - let's - just - quit" mentality. And not just in the spiritual realm. Dieting is a discipline, so we stay fat. Finishing school is a hassle, so we bail out. Cultivating a close relationship is painful, so we back off. Getting a book written is demanding, so we stop short. Working through conflict in a marriage is a tiring struggle, so we walk away. Stricking with an occupation is tough, so we start looking elsewhere..
And about the time we are ready to give it up, along comes the Master, who leans over and whispers: "Now keep going; don't quit. Keep on"

When it comes to our spiritual lives, a lot of us are all-or-nothing people. If we aren't automatically perfect, we just give up. When Christlike virtues like patience and kindness seem hard to come by, we abandon our character development and decide holiness is for those better equipped. But when we give up, we're giving up on our part of the partnership. Perseverance is one of our responsibilities in this process of being changed.

When we surrender our lives to Jesus Christ, we release the Lord of the process to do his work. For it is in our weakness that Christ is strong. It is in our inadequacy that we find him more than sufficient. And it is in our willingness to be broken that he brings wholeness - more wholeness and completeness than we ever dreamed possible.

O Christ, do not give me tasks equal to my powers,
But give me powers equal to my tasks,
For I want to be streched by things too great for me,
I want to grow through the greatness of my tasks,
But I shall need your help for the growing.
E. Stanley Jone

Thursday, June 9, 2011

FEAR FACTOR

Selama 2 bulan pake kawat gigi, aku ga pernah setakut ini kontrol ke dokter gigi.
Karena hari itu -- aku harus cabut gigi >.<
Luckily, aku datang dgn sepupu'ku -- yg juga mau pasang kawat. *jadi ada teman sengsara*
Dia dcabut 3. Aku cuma 2. Hore :D *cabutnya 1-1 kok*

Walau cuma 2 - namanya cabut mah, sakit sakit aja. Aku takkkkuuuttt luar biasa, to be honest with you~ tapi aku sok tegar, kenapa? JAIM donk, karena aku bawa dede sepupu yg jauh lebiiiiiiiiiiih takut dari aku!
Dan takutnya real bgt, ga kayak aku. Masi sok tegar and cool!
Bibirnya bergetar. Begitu juga tangan dan kaki-nya~ Pertama, I thought it was kinda cute.
Tapi lama2 .. "Ciiii, aku takut banget. Aku takut banget!" *dah mana, papa mama nya ga ikut. Jadi si cici lah yg harus menenangkan si dede* Ga tega banget.. :$
Dalam hati yg, "Duiillah, cici juga takut banget nih!"
Tapi naluri ke-cici-an langsung keluar ... dan bilang "De, tenang saja. Cabut gigi tidak sesakit yang kamu bayangkan. Jarum itu pun tidak semengerikan yang kamu bayangkan. Yang membuat kamu takut sekali hanyalah pemikiran kamu. Tenang saja, dokter ini dah biasa kok. Percaya :)"

Akirnya setelah bbrp menit, dia berhasil tenang... en CABUTZ!!
Dan tibalah, giliran cici!
Oh yeah, baby, aku harus makan omonganku sendiri!
I speak to myself -- "Ini tidak semengerikan yang aku bayangkan!"

At that moment, I realized one thing dalam hidupku...
Seringkaliiii ............ aku membayangkan sesuatu lebiiiiiiih dari kenyataannya.
Yang membuatku TAKUT - KUATIR berlebihan.

Aku ga pernah ngerti, kenapa dede2ku suka banget nonton SpongeBob! Sampai one day -- aku nonton cuma 3 menit menemani mereka. Dan ternyata, karena lucu~ :D
Ceritanya gini.. Spongebob and Patrick lagi mau pegi ke theme park. (yoi, di bawah laut). One ride yg mereka takutin banget adalah roller coaster. (oooh, I truly understand them :$)
Sampe2 - sblm mereka actually pegi ke theme park itu, SpongeBob mimpi ... mimpinya adalah -----
mulai dari kereta itu berjalan -------- naik ke puncak tertinggi ---- turun dengan kecepatan super cepat ------ and deng, rel-nya rusak ---- tiba2 Spongebob dan Patrick terlempar --- kemana? --- ke liang kubur yg 2-2nya udah ada namanya, nama mereka b2 --
Aku ketawa super ngakak ..... pas itu!! I was like "I could relate..I could relate"

Esok harinya, bener2 nih mereka naek ride-nya! *hebat juga, dah mimpi buruk gt, masi tetep naek! haha*
And, u could guess the ending..
Turun ride-nya... They danced "We didn't die.. we didn't die!"

Ooh, how I could relate, really! I have experienced it myself.
Disneysea - Tower of Terror ... (itu loooh, yg kita di angkat ke atas setinggi-nya terus dibuang ke bawah >.<)
Dari awal, setelah my cousin and my boyfriend looked very excited mau naik *it was the only ride they really looked forward buat naek, malah*... aku dah super stresss... and literally -- jantung berdebar2 ga berhenti.
Makin parah -- pas ngantri -- the whole 2 hours, aku pucat pasi -- dan takuuuuuuuuuttttt luar biasa! :$
Aku berharap -- "coba aku ga sok jago".. kayak uncle-ku yg tunggu di luar ... dengan alasan "ah, ngapain ngantri 2 jam..? gue nonton parade aja!" padahal takuut tuh :p

Sepanjang ride -- aku tutup mata! Dtambah mengerikan -- some japanese girls di belakang teriak kenceng bgt "Yameetteeeeeee --- yabaiii yabaaaiiiii" artinya "stop it stop it .. parah parah.. gawat!"

See? I was the only rider with closed eyes :$

And, setelah turun .. apa yg aku rasakan...?!
"Ooh, gitu doank toh? Kapan2 bole lagi!!!" *Yeeee? Emang Chiba deket, lyn?*

THE TERROR BEHIND ME >.<


Alrite, I might berhasil mengalahkan ketakutanku dgn tetep sok jago naek Tower of Terror!

Tapi -- kebahagiaan-ku berkurang! Aku takut sepanjang ride!
and.. I missed the most beautiful part! Saat we're on the top of the tower -- itu adalah saat u should have your eyes wide opened. To see the beauty of Disney Sea! And, me? Because of my super tiny heart, I closed my eyes -- and wished "segeralah berakhir"

Dari dokter gigi - Spongebob dan Tower of Terror..
aku realized that --
seringkali kekuatiranku dan ketakutanku mengurangi SUKACITA (the thrill from Tower of Terror) dgn sempurna. dan BLESSINGS (the beauty of Disneysea) yg sudah Tuhan sediakan di depan sana.
Jim Elliot tulis ini dalam suratnya ke Elisabeth Elliot,
Ingatlah bawah bayangan suatu benda sering melampau ukuran benda itu sendiri (apalagi jika cahayanya begitu rendah pada horizon) dan meskipun sebagian ketakutan terhadap masa depan mungkin akan memamerkan kegelapannya yg mengerikan saat kau mendekatinya, tapi semuanya itu hanya sebuah bintik (a speck) saat dilihat dr seberang. Oh, kiranya Ia sering memulihkan kita dengan "aspek (aspect) dr sebrang" untuk melihat sesuatu sebagaimana Ia melihatnya, untuk mengingat bahwa Ia berelasi dengan kita bagaikan dengan anak2Nya.

Oke -- Tower of Terror might be just a little thing --
tapi seberapa sering, kekuatiran kita akan hari depan membuat kita ga mampu melangkah, bahkan mundur?
Or seandainya, dengan berani kita tetap melangkah pun, tidak ada sukacita along the way? Karena kita masi memegang teguh kuatir dan takut kita - dan belum menyerah~
"Serahkanlah kekuatiranmu kepadaNya, sebab Ia memelihara kamu." begitu kata Rasul Petrus.

Entah itu a new job, moving out, a new relationship, a new step of relationship, graduate school -- or any decision yg saat ini sedang kita gumulkan (baca= takutkan). If God clearly says "GO!"
Don't let your fear and worries hold you back!
There are joy and blessings God has provided, you just need to take a step.

Dan terlebih, Dia jelas tahu apa yg akan kita lalui.
*bukan berarti kita selonong boy - ga berhikmat ya! Kalo dah jelas2, begitu ada orang teriak, kita kaget, pingsan. Itu berarti jantung ga kuat! Jangan sok2 jago naek roller coaster! *
Tapi, kalo ketakutan itu hanya krn pemikiran kita yg terlalu kreatif.. mari serahkan kepada sang Ahli tuk mengubahnya menjadi damai sejati!
Again, Filipi 4:6-7 :) Let Him work in you!

Oh btw, buat Anda sang Pemberani - jangan juga anggap ketakutan seseorang itu hal yg kecil loh :$ krn most of the time, we are really freaking scared! >.< Don't laugh at us! Understand and encourage us..
It takes a courage sometimes to tell how scared we are! We need someone to have sympathy.
Once, ketika aku shared ke anak2 remaja, bgmana aku takut bgt naek roller coaster. One teenage boy said this "I prayed before I took the ride ci. Awalnya aku takut banget, setelah itu, gak lagi :)". What an encouragement!!

Let's have a super joy and super peace along the ride with the Lord!
He's the one who has the complete picture, and after all - He is in control! Trust Him! *as I trusted the dentist and Disney sea :$*
We are just to enjoy the ride! :D :D

Friday, April 8, 2011

when God brings back my past

April 6th, 2011


Are u familiar with “I hope he is my first and my last”, girls? I believe most of us ever had that thought! At least, I did!

Krn, tentu-nya pada umumnya, ketika kita commit tuk menjalani suatu hubungan, kita berharap kalo the relationship will last.. *I am talking about serious relationship * I am pretty sure, kita ga ada rencana putus!


But, the thing is tidak semua orang berkesempatan menikah dgn her first boyfriend.

Tidak semua orang berkesempatan mengetahui (dan mengerti) sejak dia kecil – ketika apa yg namanya “cinta” sudah mulai menaburkan benihnya di hati – bahwa pacaran itu untuk something serious – bukan hanya sekedar “teman saya sudah punya pacar, saya juga harus!” – or - bukan karena “kalo saya tidak pacaran, tar dipikir saya tidak laku, so lebih baik saya terima siapapun yg nembak saya” – atau - “masa saya harus sendirian pas attend sweet 17th party or prom nite?” – ataupun – karena “kata orang, hidup hanya sekali, jadi explore lah selagi kamu bisa, toh ga ada ruginya pacaran”.

Tidak semua orang berkesempatan diajarkan ataupun mendengar pengalaman pahit dari orang yg lebih tua bahwa “pacaran hanya dengan fondasi suka sama suka (baca = cinta sejati) itu tetap ada kesempatan putus” … dan tidak semua orang, for sure, mengetahui dari awal bahwa yg dibilang “lebih baik sakit gigi daripada sakit hati” itu adalah FAKTA!


Ya, beberapa orang, atau mungkin sebagian besar orang menikah dengan pacar-nya yg kesekian.

*Untuk-ku pribadi tentunya, I hope he is my second and my last. *


Bagiku, “berkesempatan” saying “he was my first and certainly not my last” adalah masa2 pergumulan dan kehancuran terhebat *sejauh ini* setelah kematian my grannie.


Seminggu belakangan ini, karena satu hal, membuat pikiranku cukup kacau ttg my relationship skrg *dan actually, membuat hatiku cukup sakit*, not being able to share my feelings with anyone,

(“Many times I have been forced to my knees, realizing there was no other place to go”. –Abraham Lincoln-)

aku menuangkan hatiku dan menceritakan semuanya ke Tuhan – dari yg tidak tau apa2 *mengapa, apa dan bagaimana”, pelan-pelan dia bukakan “what’s actually going on with me?”

it’s not that my relationship was in trouble, tapi justru karena my relationship skrg is such a blessing, and I thank about it everyday-lah, aku jadi "kacau".


Then, aku realized, yg membuat-ku luar biasa kacau, adalah karena aku takut gagal! Aku takut kalo segala sesuatu yg indah harus berakhir dst… PARNO abiz :$ aku yang “huhu, mengapa harus ada yg namanya kegagalan di masa lalu? Kalo harus gagal, mengapa aku harus pacaran at the first place“

I felt helpless, I shouted… “I NEED HELP!!”


And what amazing God He is, saat itu juga, aku buka “My Utmost for His Highest”, and u wouldn’t believe what’s written there……

Never be afraid when God brings back your past. Let your memory have its way with you. It is a minister of God bringing its rebuke and sorrow to you. God will turn what might have been into a wonderful lesson of growth for the future.

-----

Seketika itu juga, badaiku Dia tenangkan.. Dia, Allah yg menjawab kegalauan hatiku when I needed it the most – Dia reminded me once again, "everything is under My control, Eyn!"


Dear, girls, of course, “sepertinya” semua akan lebih indah – bila tidak pernah ada yg namanya hancur hati karena putus cinta, namun bukan berarti hidup kita akan hancur berantakan, dan kita tidak akan punya next relationship yg jauh lebih indah.

*aku bilang “sepertinya”, karena aku tidak lagi mengerti apa itu rasanya kalo aku tidak pernah mengalami patah hati, yg ku rasakan saat ini adalah Tuhan sungguh bekerja luar biasa sepanjang hidupku – walau aku tidak berkesempatan to have my first boyfriend to be my last. *


Mungkin saja, seandainya saat itu (13 tahun yang lalu), aku tidak membiarkan perasaan hati bergejolak menguasai pikiranku *kalo P. Tong bilang – pacaran masa remaja adalah pacaran paling murni, karena mereka hanya lihat cinta, bukan karir, bukan kedudukan, bukan materi. Dan aku meng-AMIN-i hal itu* -- seandainya saat itu, aku bisa konsul dulu ke hamba Tuhan – or seandainya saat itu, aku taat ke mama “masi kecil, jangan pacaran dulu!” – mungkin aku tidak perlu mengalami hancur hati!


BUT GOD, Dia Allah yang bekerja dalam segala sesuatu * baik dalam kesalahanku * untuk mendatangkan kebaikan bagiku.(Roma 8:28)

I am not suggesting you to “kalo gitu, coba aja, pacaran lah – toh kalo salah, Tuhan bekerja kok!!!” NO!!!!

yg aku mau katakan adalah, walaupun kita gagal – selalu ada yg Tuhan mampu kerjakan tuk mendatangkan kebaikan bagi kita.


Yes, ada kesalahan, ada konsekuensi, ada sakit parah~~! Tapi ketika kita mau bertekuk lutut – menyerah di hadapan Tuhan, Dia akan mengganti tangis kita menjadi sukacita besar.


Kegagalanku membuatku menyadari – bahwa cinta yg murni sekalipun tidak cukup untuk menjaga suatu relationship, hanya Allah-lah yg mampu. Ya, I did put my confidence in my love, not in Him.


Pengalaman ku berpacaran masa remaja, membuatku mampu bilang ke adik2ku di remaja …”mengapa sebaiknya tidak pacaran saat remaja, bukan karena cici jago secara teori, tapi karena cici pernah praktek secara langsung dan cici harus bayar mahal.”


Hancur-nya hatiku membuatku melihat mujizat Tuhan yg luar biasa – dari sebuah hati yg sepertinya tidak ada harapan untuk pulih, menjadi sebuah hati baru yg mampu mengasihi kembali. I said it again, for me, it’s a miracle.


Aku experienced setiap kata dari lagu “Sentuh Hatiku” *lagu2 di awal putus cinta*

Betapa ku mencintai segala yg tlah terjadi, tak pernah sendiri jalani hidup ini selalu menyertai.

Betapa ku menyadari, di dalam hidupku ini, Kau selalu memberi rancangan yg terbaik oleh karena kasih.

Bapa, sentuh hatiku, ubah hidupku menjadi yg baru, bagai emas yg murni Kau membentuk bejana hatiku

Bapa, ajar ku mengerti semua kasih yg selalu memberi, bagai air mengalir, yg tiada pernah berhenti.


Dan, kesempatan ku menjadi single lagi – adalah masa2 Tuhan menyatakan kembali nilai dirku di hadapanNya, siapa aku, dan apa yg Dia mau kerjakan dalam hidupku. *nah, ini juga kenapa, adik2ku sayang, kenapa cici anjurkan “jgn pacaran dulu skrg” – krn kalian butuh waktu tuk kenal dirimu …. * dan really, aku sangat bersyukur akan hal ini.


So, dear girls…..dimanapun posisi mu saat ini…

Entah kamu masi mampu berharap that your guy would be your first and last… bersyukurlah akan that privilege, ikuti waktu Tuhan karena saat ini adalah redeeming time, waktu yg tidak akan pernah kembali.


Atau…

Kamu baru saja mengucapkan “selamat jalan cita2ku” – ijinkan Tuhan masuk dalam hati-mu dan meng-operasi bagian terintim dalam hidup mu. Don’t let other man to fix your heart, it is His!

Here’s why = hanya Tuhan yg mampu mengobati hati kita, karena Dia lah yg created it. AND, you want to love your next guy with hatimu yg utuh – bukan dengan hatimu yg hancur. Kalo Justin Bieber bilang “I just need somebody to love!” yeah .. we need somebody to love, TAPI, dgn hati yg sudah mengampuni – dgn hati yg sudah dipulihkan – dgn hati yg siap tuk mengasihi dgn kasih yg murni.

It took me years ..haha (well, waktu semua orang tidak sama). Awal2, aku tutup hatiku – I let Him to operate it, and pada saat it’s ready – aku ikut maunya Dia – dan aku merasakan lagi indahnya mengasihi seperti cinta pertama…

(bahkan dengan lebih indah, karena hatiku semakin terasah to memancarkan kasih yg lebih murni *dan Allah tidak pernah berhenti bekerja, I constantly pray to Him to purify my heart so I could love unselfishly* )

Lupakan yg dunia bilang "satu2 caranya tuk melupakan mantan pacar adalah dengan mendapat pacar baru" -- itu berarti, kita membawa luka ke dalam suatu hubungan yg baru. You don't want that!

Really, girls, Dia mampu melakukan miracle dalam hati kita!! He is the Creator! And, ur man (ur future husband) deserves hati kita yg utuh dan yg sudah dipulihkan. It’s not his job, once again I would say, to fix your heart. Serahkan kepada ahlinya, the Creator!


Atau…

Kamu (seperti aku) sedang tahap mendoakan cowo kedua-mu, or ketiga, or seterusnya to be your last! Jadikan kegagalan / kesalahan / pengalaman kita to menjadi sthing really wonderful for our future. Don’t be afraid and ga perlu pula menyesali “kenapa aku bodoh dulu? Kenapa aku salah dulu?” – dan - marilah, ajarilah adik2 kita kegagalan / kesalahan / pengalaman kita. Karena, really, there are reasons mengapa kita harus mengalami itu semua, buat ku, salah satunya – supaya aku bisa share things kepada adik2ku yg kukasihi – dan nanti kelak ke anak2ku.


DAN …

Kalau kamu adalah anak2 sekolah minggu cici……………… Cerita2 ke cici ;) ayuk!


<3 All by His grace <3


'til He completes...

April 2nd, 2011


Beberapa hari yg lalu, I asked my friend how she was - and she replied "I am much better, Lyn, and spt yg lu doain ke gue - Tuhan will continue the good work within me yg He has started at the first place. Thanks, Lyn!"

Yup, aku sering sekali quote ayat ini:

"And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue His work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns." Philippians 1:6 ... ketika aku mendoakan orang lain - or memimpin doa bersama2, karena ayat ini juga yg berulang kali aku doakan ketika hatiku mulai goyah di tengah2 perjalananku *dalam banyak area*


Then, aku berpikir ... "Wih bener yah, ayat ini emang dahsyat !! Asik bener emang krn Tuhan ga akan stop sampe kerjaan dalam hidupku tuntas! Bisa tenang bgt deh! :D"


lalu aku mulai melihat2 kamar2 dalam hidupku "is it really true, semuanya baik2 saja? does God really work in my life?"

- pekerjaan - family - finances - relationships - ministries - dreams and so on -

semakin aku merenung, kalo hatiku ibaratnya bunga yg sedang mekar -- tiba2 layu.

Boro2 semuanya baik2 saja, yg ada aku struggle everyday *begitu pikirku* keadaanku tidak baik! >.<


Dan suddenly aku realized at that moment, seringkali keadaan *yg menurutku* tidak baik membuatku lupa pada satu hal yang tidak pernah berubah, bahwa ALLAH ITU BAIK!

dan betapa baiknya Allahku, saat itu juga - lagu di mobilku yg berputar adalah...

Kecaplah dan lihatlah, betapa baiknya Tuhan itu.

Rasakan dan nikmati, kasih setia Tuhan.

Syukur bagiMu Tuhan, segalah hormat bagiMu Tuhan.

Allah yang mengasihiku - Allah yang memeliharaku selamanya.

Ketika aku mampu mengecap – melihat – merasakan – menikmati kebaikan Tuhan yg tidak pernah berubah, itulah ketika aku melihat situasiku dari kacamataNya.

Aku menyadari, bagaimana seringkali situasi membuatku meragukan kebaikanNya dan pekerjaanNya dalam hidupku.

(itulah gunanya aku hafal ay Filipi 1:6.. haha.. jadi ketika ragu2 lagi, aku terus diingatkan akan kebenaran firmanNya :$)

God cares more about my character than He does my comfort. And saat2 tidak indah *menurutku* adalah saat pembentukan yg sebenarnya adalah indah.

Dia memulai pekerjaan yang baik dalam diriku – yaitu, diriku sendiri – dan Dia akan mengakhirinya – sampai aku serupa dengan Dia.


Putus dengan pacar - adalah hal yg mnrt siapapun adalah disaster - tapi buatku, itu adalah bagian Tuhan membentuk hatiku dengan luar biasa hebatnya. (sekarang sih dah bisa ngomong gini.. haha... dulu aja nangis2 bombay - sampe sakit2an)

Bekerja banting tulang (dan lemak) di negeri penjajah demi sesuap nasi (dan segoncreng roti, eskrim, snacks...tiket jakarta-jepang) - mgkn adalah hal yg cukup dkasihani - tapi buatku, itu bagian Tuhan mempersiapkanku tuk tanggung jawab yg lebih besar. (dulu aja mikir...."mengapa saya harus bangun jam 5 dan pulang jam 10 malam buat kerjaaaaa??!? mengapa saya harus nyapuuuuu - cuci piring - dimarahin orjep2? enakan di indoooooo)


Dan one thing yg Tuhan ingatkan aku hari ini adalah pekerjaan Tuhan di setiap orang tidak sama.

Kemajuan teknologi (ok, i am talking about fb!) membuat kita dengan mudah tau apa yg terjadi dgn kehidupan orang lain.. padahal (mgkn) mostly hanya good parts of their lives yg people show on their facebooks ..

Aku bukan berarti bilang STOP CHECKING ON OTHERS' FB!! NO NO!

Tetapi jangan jadikan kondisi orang lain sebagai tolak ukur!

Karena:

1. We never really know how people struggle inside.

2. Tuhan bekerja dengan cara yg berbeda dalam diri setiap orang – oh Tuhan itu begitu unik dan creative :D


Bukan berarti, keadaan kita lebih buruk *baca=bodoh* dibanding teman kita, yg dulu rankingnya di bawah kita, sekarang dah jadi professor or dokter bedah syaraf (hihi, saya ngefans sama si Derek Shepherd - Grey's Anatomy soalnya) * karena facebook bilang!*

Or "oh no mantan pacar udah kawin, sementara saya masi jomblo!! >.<"

Atau mengganggap teman kita lebih sukses karena kerja dari terbit matahari sampai pada masuknya sambil mengelilingi bumi juga, sedangkan kerjaan kita gini2 aja (tenggo - duduk aja di kantor >.<)

(….ok, I’ll stop rite here, coz to be honest with you, I am not really good at this! Haha)


My point is, sekali lagi, He works differently dalam setiap kita …

Buatku pribadi, membandingkan diriku sendiri (saat ini) dengan diriku sendiri (dulu) sangat lebih membantu daripada membandingkan diriku sendiri dengan orang lain.

*of course ga ada salahnya, belajar dari orang lain dan tidak puas dengan diri sendiri … hanya, jangan sampai itu membuat kita feel incomplete or distressed by our shortcomings. Keep learning from others! ^^


Refleksi diri, membuatku mengingat kembali kebaikan Tuhan (yg sering kali susah kita rasakan ketika keadaan sedang tidak baik)– dan menyadarkanku bahwa semua yg kucapai sampai saat ini adalah anugrahNya, dan bukti pekerjaanNya yg nyata dalam hidupku. Dan bagiku, itu adalah kekuatan tuk melangkah ke depan.

Kita mungkin tidak secemerlang – sesukses – sekaya orang lain - or relationship kita tidak semulus/seindah orang lain, namun pekerjaanNya tidak terbatas pada bagaimana diri kita dibanding dengan orang lain. Tapi kepada bagaimana diri kita disempurnakan setiap hari 'tuk menjadi sesuai rancanganNya semula (apapun itu yg sudah Tuhan prepared buat kita - yang unik dan berbeda dari orang lain).


Aku berharap kita semua bisa seperti Paulus .... saying that there has never been (or kalo dulu pernah) -- : from now on, there will never be the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in me would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears. (the message)

how i want to spend my last days in 2010 ~

December 2nd, 2010


Memasuki Desember, sejak ku-kecil, selalu ada joy yang tidak dapat digantikan oleh bulan manapun, u know - Christmas' songs and decorations, and buat-ku, yang bikin selalu bahagia adalah persiapan acara Natal, entah itu nari - nyanyi or drama - bagiku itu adalah hal terindah yg dpt kukerjakan dalam hidupku (saat itu)!

Di remaja, ya, masi ada itulah acara Natal - hanya saja lebih sibuk, as in aku jadi bagian yg ngurusin acaranya, ga cuma pengisi acara. Namun bedanya, ada joy yg betul2 joy, karena aku tau siapa yg aku layani (aku sungguh2 mengenal sang Juruselamat yg lahir saat Natal itu ketika remaja).

Masa2 kecil (SD) sampai remaja - adalah masa2 yg sangat teratur - sekolah - ulangan umum - libur natal - sekolah ulangan umum - libur kenaekan kelas dan begitu lagi! Jadi pretty much, kita bisa mengatur kesibukan kita sesuai schedule yg teratur dan tidak berubah itu. Kalau masa2ku sampai remaja - setiap Desember itu diisi dengan, "what kind of Christmas celebration I have this year?", yup ketika SD - dgn alasan hanya tuk hepi2, ketika remaja - dgn alasan it is for HIM! superjoy!


Semakin beranjak dewasa, somehow - Desember not only reminds me of Christmas *JOY*, but also reminds me that "I am getting older" - "udah lewat lagi lah ini setahun" - "aduh saatnya untuk refleksi diri dan cek resolusi taon ini yg sudah kesampean dan belum" en bersiap2 tuk resolusi taon depan. *THINK HARD*


Tahun ini (sesungguhnya bbrp tahun belakangan ini), Desemberku selalu diisi dengan ketegangan - rushing dengan banyaknya hal yg harus kukerjakan dan belum, padahal dah mau kelar ini tahun. *kupikir* Ditambah "perasaanku" ttg kegagalan tahun ini "I don't exercise much!" "I haven't given much!" "I've failed in these areas" and so on...

Apalagi tahun ini, with my sister's wedding that is just around the corner - tiap hari aku bangun dengan "tanggal berapa ini?" (i am counting days)- "Oh dear God, grant me strength and wisdom to deal with my day, it's just too much somehow!" ~~~ en always, I check on my bb - liat any emails or bbm or sms yg masuk, entah itu related dgn kerjaan or tanggungjawab ku yg laen >.< "perlu siapin ini siapin itu!"

Dgn semuanya itu, aku sampe b'pikir - "there's no way bisa ntn Rapunzel 3D - pasti deh, by the time I have time to watch, uda keburu turun itu film - spt Step Up 3D-ku..huhu T_T 'coz i have no time no time! there's no time to hepi2"

And u know what, semua pemikiran itu bikin aku leemeeees dari pagi tuk jalani hari, thinking too much >.<


Dan pagi ini, dateng email dari Proverbs 31 Ministries judulnya "Don't Overthink It" - just by reading the subject, I knew He spoke to me this morning, and yeah - there was a smile on my face.

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I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with my life — and I’m running out of time to figure it out. What if I never find it? Will I always be unhappy and unfulfilled? Will I never achieve my purpose? What will God do about that – will He call me a bad servant? But I can’t help it. Why doesn’t He answer my prayers for direction?

Maybe I’m just too sinful or something. I know I should read the Bible more. Is this limbo I’m in some kind of punishment for that? Am I really so much worse than everybody else? Maybe I just don’t have any special gifts or talents. Or they just never got developed. Maybe that’s it, and maybe now it’s too late. So what do I do now? I don’t know what I’m supposed to do …


Does this resemble your thinking sometimes? Perhaps not about your calling, but about finding a spouse, or affording a house, or exercising regularly, or a conflict with your mother or boss. Do you tend to overthink things? To worry and ruminate? To endlessly, passively, excessively ponder the meanings, causes and potential consequences of your problems? Do you dwell on them?

Many of us believe that when we feel down about something we should try to evaluate our feelings and our situation from every angle to attain insight and find solutions to relieve our unhappiness. However, a host of research in the last 20 years has shown that dwelling on thoughts like this creates negative outcomes: it sustains or worsens sadness, fosters negative thinking, depletes motivation, saps energy, interferes with concentration, and typically impairs our problem-solving.

Professor Sonja Lyubomirsky writes: “Although people have a strong sense that they are gaining insight into themselves and their problems during their ruminations, this is rarely the case. What they do gain is a distorted, pessimistic perspective on their lives.” She adds, “You need to free yourself from the clutch of your ruminations – in other words, immediately stop overthinking.”

Based on what he wrote in Philippians 4:6-13, I think the apostle Paul would agree with the professor.


Philippians 4:

6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 9 Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.

10 How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. 11 Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. 12 I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. 13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.


As we see, in verse six, Paul gives three clear instructions for those of us who ruminate on our problems. He says:

1) do not worry about anything

2) pray about everything

3) thank God for everything


What if today we took this instruction to heart and put it into practice? What if today we decided not to worry about anything? What if when we found ourselves worrying, we stopped and handed the situation over to God in prayer? What if we then thanked Him for taking care of the issue?

In fact, what if we spent most of our mental free-time today thinking about what good care our awesome God takes of us?

What if we counted our blessings and God’s acts of faithfulness today — and again tomorrow and next week too? What would happen then?

Paul says in verse seven, we will begin to experience amazing peace — a kind of peace we can’t even imagine. Peace that makes no earthly sense! This kind of peace is so powerful that it has a protective function on our hearts and minds — which only makes it easier for us to stop worrying and be thankful.

That sounds like a state of happiness to me! So let’s not over-think it today. Let’s not under-pray it either. Let’s actively choose to have a happy, thankful day. And then let’s get up tomorrow and do it again.

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Yes -- 2010 emang sudah hampir habis, tapi aku mau isi sisa 29 hari di tahun ini experiencing His amazing peace and joy.

I choose not to over-think things, not to under-pray them either!

I will still make my "to do list" 'til eoy 2010 and my "2011 resolutions" - but I choose not to worry about them, yet to pray about them, and thank Him for EVERYTHING!

So, I can laugh (OUT LOUD) without fear of the future (Proverbs 31:25) hohoho :D :D


* and I guess, spending 2 hours (+1 hour di jalan) saying hello to Rapunzel with my sis won't cost my time much, huh? *

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

ketika tamu kuatir mengetuk

“Janganlah hendaknya kamu kuatir tentang apapun juga, tetapi nyatakanlah dalam segala hal keinginanmu kepada Allah dalam doa dan permohonan dengan ucapan syukur”

Ini salah satu ayat favorit.
Apalagi lanjutan-nya….
“dan DAMAI SEJAHTERA ALLAH YANG MELAMPAUI SEGALA AKAL akan memelihara hati dan pikiranmu dalam Kristus Yesus”
Kekuatiran (mungkin kita lebih kenal dengan STRESS OR PARNO) diganti dengan damai sejahtera yg melampaui segala akal, siapa yg gak mau?!?!?
Mauuuuuuuuu bgt, Tuhan! :D :D :D

Beberapa saat belakangan ini, hampir setiap hari, ada tamu setia yg mengunjungiku, kekuatiran dan keraguan ttg certain things. Walaupun tetap, pada malam harinya, aku selalu list ke Tuhan dan bilang “Tuhan, eyn kuatir ini eyn kuatir ini……..huhu”. Selalu besok paginya, muncuuul lagi-muncul lagi, capeeee deh >.<, karena emang masalahnya belum kelar-kelar. *masi musim ujian*

I know that being worry is a sin, I couldn’t help though; worries are all over me >.<
Akirnya aku bilang ke Tuhan kemarin, “ok Lord, eyn gak bisa handle “this worry”, but this what I am gonna do, setiap kali worry eyn muncul, eyn akan berdoa, udah itu aja deh, eyn akan tukar worry-eyn dengan doa, ya Tuhan yah? “
Aku rindu punya His peace which transcends all understanding, sungguh! Aku gak suka ketika aku harus dealing with worries *emang enak dag-dig-dug?*, namun kondisi belakangan ini sungguh “mendukung”ku tuk worry. Duh!
Walaupun Tuhan berulang kali ingetin, “Jangan kuatir, eyn! Jangan kuatir, eyn!” And juga, aku berulang kali ngomong ke myself, and repeat verses about worries, on and on. Tapi tetep aja, masi kuatir >.<
1 Petrus 5:7 Serahkanlah semua kekuatiranmu kepadaNya sebab Ia yang memelihara kamu.
Matthew 6 “Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need. So, don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.”

Indah bukan?

Ada kala dimana aku menukar worry-ku dengan doa sambil tersenyum, ada kala dimana aku menukarnya sambil menangis… karena sungguh, aku merasakan ketidakberdayaanku. Merasakan betapa hanya Dia-lah yang mampu menghandle semua ini.

And today, Matthew 15:28, a super simple verse…
“Dear woman,” Jesus said to her, “your faith is great. YOUR REQUEST IS GRANTED”~~~!!!!
I felt somehow He talked to me, not that I am saying my faith is great, boro-boro, saat ini aku lagi “lemeeeeeeees” gak kira2. Tapi Yesus dengan penuh kasih meyakinkanku bahwa, alasan kenapa kita harus gak *tidak boleh* worry, and present our request to Him itu karena He is the one who’s gonna grant the request. Dialah tempat yg tepat untuk kita minta!! Jangan kemana2….!!

Memang tidak selamanya yg kita “minta” diberikan, karena Dia lebih tau yg terbaik buat kita, dan Tuhan memberi yg kita butuh, bukan yg kita mau. Dan percaya deh, ngeri juga kalo semua yg kita mau dikasi.. >.<
Rick Warren bilang gini, “There's a difference between needs and wants. God's not going to give you everything you want; you'd be spoiled to death.”
Tapi kita tahu, ketika tamu kuatir mengetuk pintu, hal terbaik yg bisa lakukan adalah menyerahkan SEMUANYA itu kepada Allah yg memegang kontrol atas SEMUANYA!!
Dan kita akan mendapatkan hadiah pertama...DAMAI SEJAHTERA ALLAH yg melampaui segala akal.
True peace is not found in positive thinking, in absence of conflict, or in good feelings. It comes from knowing that God is in control.

Do you want to worry less? Then pray more! Whenever you start to worry, stop and pray!

how we need His touch!

From Crosswalk Women: Five Areas of Woman's Life that Need God's Touch by Cindi McMenamin

My heart was convicted as I read in Scripture of a woman who was so desperate for God's healing in her life, she was willing to do anything to just touch Him (Mark 5:24-34).

I had to ask myself, how desperate am I for God's touch on my life? There are times I might be desperate to feel and look younger, to be thinner, to have more in the way of peace and happiness. But how desperate am I to be whole and complete in every way?

After surveying nearly 100 women, I found several common areas in which women, myself included, need the touch of God to be whole and complete. I also found that Scripture addresses these areas of a woman's life so that we can receive His healing touch. See if you can relate to needing God's touch in these areas of your life, as well:

1. Our Hearts - So They Can Be "Set On Things Above"
Women often stress over the temporal - bills that must be paid, whether or not a man will come into our lives, if we'll be able to have a child, what someone is saying about us, how our body looks, and so on. At times we are more concerned about what the scales say than what God says. Our heart is closely attuned to our bank balance, rather than our life's balance.

Yet God instructs us in Colossians 3:1-2: "set your hearts on things above." If our priorities were in heaven, not on this earth, we would not only be happier and healthier, but less financially drained and emotionally spent. Matthew 6:19-21 tells us not to "store up treasures here on earth where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven ....For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." It takes God's touch to clear our hearts of what this world says is important and focus it on the things above.

2. Our Minds - So They Are Transformed and Renewed
It's amazing how many women profess to know God and follow Him, yet their thinking patterns are just like those of anyone else in the world. Scripture commands us: "Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is" (Romans 12:2, NLT).

Furthermore, God's Word instructs: "fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise...and the God of peace will be with you" (Philippians 4:8-9, NLT). What mental anguish we would spare ourselves from if we would let God transform our mind and renew our thoughts to think as He would.

3. Our Mouths - To Be Wholesome and Pleasing to God
Because women tend to be communicators, we can cause much damage with our mouths if we do not bring them under God's control. Whether it is gossip, criticism or unkind remarks, our mouths can be instruments of righteousness or unrighteousness. In Ephesians 4:29 we are told to "not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up, according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." God's touch on our lives can make us women whose words heal and encourage, rather than distract and destroy.

4. Our Bodies - To Be Pure and Holy for Him
Are you one to worry and stress about what the scale says, how many calories you took in, and whether or not you can still fit into a certain size? God's command to us is "Give your bodies to God. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice - the kind he will accept. When you think of what he has done for you, is this too much to ask?" (Romans 12:1, NLT). It is important that we keep our bodies healthy and in good shape (as we are His temple), but God says our most prevalent concern should be that we keep our bodies holy. In fact, God calls keeping our bodies holy our "spiritual act of worship" (Romans 12:1, NIV).

One of the ways we can keep our bodies holy is by how we choose to dress. People can tell much about us, and whom we love, by how we dress. Do we call attention to ourselves or the God who made us? If the way we dress says "Look at me!" we may want to rethink how we dress so that others can see Christ through us. Can others see Christ in you or are you getting in the way?

5. Our Emotions - To Be Calmed with the Peace of God
There are days when, hormonally or just circumstantially, we need God's touch to calm our frazzled emotions and level out our lives. Philippians 4:6-7 says "Don't' worry about anything, but pray about everything. With thankful hearts offer up your prayers and request to God. Then, because you belong to Christ Jesus, God will bless you with peace that no one can completely understand. And this peace will control the way you think and feel" (CEV). A woman who is controlled by God's peace is not on the edge, but in the spacious place of His embrace.

I believe if we seek God's touch in those five areas of our lives we would rarely have reason to feel we are going over the edge. For instance, when you get frustrated in a relationship, go back to the principle of letting God transform and renew your mind to only think on whatever is pure, right, lovely, good, and so on. And when you are about to lose it over finances or something that takes you by surprise, remember to not be anxious about anything, but to pray about everything...keeping a heart of thanksgiving for what you've been given. And when your heart begins to desire something that you cannot attain, remember to set your heart on things above.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

He never sleeps

May 6th 2010

Tidak ada aturan jam malam di rumah kami.

Sejak kecil, saya diajarkan untuk memikirkan sendiri keputusan apa yg terbaik untuk diambil dan bertanggung jawab atas keputusan itu. *pastinya dengan consult dulu ke mama* Tapi, saya sangat suka dengan cara mama mengajar.. “kalau KALAU KAMU SAYANG MAMA.. kamu pasti tidak akan berbuat ini .. berbuat itu .. kamu pasti rajin belajar”. Jadi walaupun dari kecil, saya ‘dibebaskan’, tapi karena kalimat sakti ‘sayang mama’, kebebasan itu selalu dapat dipertanggungjawabkan.

Begitu juga dengan jam malam, mama saya selalu kasi kebebasan jam berapa saya pulang ke rumah. *of course, dengan kuatir dan suka telp-in juga* yg penting jelas.. dengan siapa dan kemana. Naaah… tapi kalau sudah lewat dari jam 11 malam; betul, mama gak pernah marah *paling2 ngambek kalo kangen doank*, tapi saya selalu mendapat hukuman:
Disambut oleh seisi keluarga yang sudah tidur semua *bagi saya ini adalah hukuman..karena saya BUTUH BICARA dengan keluarga saya*
Disambut oleh anjing tetangga yang selalu menghadang di depan pintu rumah *bagi saya ini adalah hukuman, karena saya sangat takut dengan anjing, walaupun hanya menggonggong*
*One nite, I kept standing for several minutes outside – couldn’t enter the house – the dogs didn’t stop barking, and I was really sure they were staring at me, I couldn’t see them..coz it was really dark.. >.< I was hoping they would stop, but they never did!! For me, it was a super cruel punishment. * Walaupun begitu, saya sangat bersyukur dengan keberadaan anjing2 galak tetangga itu.. karena sedikit banyak mereka itu jagain rumah2 kami dari pencuri.. *walaupun sebenernya anjing2 itu cuma jago nge-gonggong doank sih*. Tapi setidaknya, mereka mampu membuat keributan luar biasa sehingga bisa membangunkan orang2. Karena emang pernah ada kejadian..ada pencuri mau masuk ke rumah tetangga mana..dan cukup dihebohkan dengan paduan suara anjing2 itu. Sejak kejadian itu, setiap kali ada bunyi motor + suara merdu anjing2 itu, mama dan saya selalu bangun. Mama bangun, karena suka parno2 dan kuatir. Saya juga suka ikut bangun, karena saya tidur selalu malam.. jadi biasa belum nyenyak. *padahal puji Tuhan, selama ini, itu hanya murni karena suara motor tetangga.. atau biasalah hanya anjing menyambut tetangga pulang ke rumah. Bukan apa2* Kemarin malam, saya sedang menikmati waktu baca malam.. mama sudah tidur… dan anjing2 itu bersuara lagi! Mama langsung ke luar kamar to see what’s going on.. *praise the Lord..it was always nothing!* I was so worried .. liat mama tidurnya gak nyenyak en suka parno-kuatir selalu. >.< This morning, I talked to her.. “mom, could u stop worrying about things? Tidur lah, ma.. gak usah mikirin ini itu. Coz..mama tau kan Tuhan menjaga mama..ketika mama sedang tidur sekalipun? “ “I lay down and slept, yet I woke up in safety, for the Lord was watching over me.” ~ Psalm 3:5 ~ I continued, “Ma, Tuhan itu gak pernah tertidur ketika menjaga mama!” “He will not let you stumble; the one who watches over you will not slumber. Indeed, He who watches over Israel NEVER slumbers or SLEEPS.” ~ Psalm 121:3-4 ~ And my mom, dengan segala kejujuran-kepolosan-kekuatiran-kewaspadaan-dan keparnoannya, jawab : “iya Tuhan emang mungkin gak pernah tidur.. tapi kan Tuhan bisa aja ngantuk.. atau lagi liat ke arah yang lain.. makanya kita juga mesti hati2 sendiri.” >.<


Saya terhentak dengan jawaban mama! Walau saya sangat tidak setuju tentang Tuhan ngantuk itu, karena sedetikpun kita tidak pernah lepas dari penyertaanNya. AMIN! Tapi pernyataan mama mengingatkan saya tentang perlu-nya waspada. (setiap mama bangun, mama jadi cek kembali apakah rumah sudah dikunci).



John Piper dalam buku renungan “”Life as a Vapor”..bilang gini:
“Siapakah di antara kamu yg karena kekuatirannya dapat menambahkan sehasta saja pada jalan hidupnya?”
Kekuatiran adalah perasaan yg berbelit-belit, tegang, dan penuh ketakutan di dalam hati, yang mungkin disertai atau tidak disertai dengan kewaspadaan yang rasional; dan kewaspadaan itulah yang menambahkan sehasta pada jalan hidup Anda, bukan perasaan-perasaan negatif. Kewaspadaan telah memperpanjang banyak kehidupan; kekuatiran tidak memperpanjang kehidupan siapapun dan memperpendek kehidupan banyak orang.
“Jangan kuatir akan hidupmu (Lukas 12:22) BUKAN BERARTI : Berjalanlah pada saat lampu merah menyala (mungkin kalau dalam kasus saya dan mama : tidak usah mengunci pintu rumah ketika malam). Artinya jangan berfantasi dengan gugup tentang bagaimana Anda akan tertabrak di jalur penyebrangan (bagaimana kalau ternyata anjing2 itu berteriak untuk memberitahu mama saya ttg pencuri di rumah). Artinya percayalah, kalaupun Anda sungguh-sungguh tertabrak, Allah masih memegang kendali dan Anda akan bersamaNya dan Ia akan memelihara keluarga Anda (saya tidak berani meng-analogikan dengan cerita anjing + pencuri itu lagi, tapi yaaah.. kira2 begitulah maksudnya ;p) …


God is in control.
“You can go to bed without fear; you will lie down and sleep soundly. You need not be afraid of sudden disaster or the destruction that comes upon the wicked, for the Lord is your security. He will keep your foot from being caught in a trap.” ~Proverbs 3:24-26~


I can’t control those loud dogs.. I can’t control who will visit my neighborhood. But, I know..God is in control!!!
What I can do itu cuma memastikan pintu rumah terkunci sebelum tidur..BERDOA..mengajak mama berdoa dan menceritakan kebenaran ini terus-menerus…dan tidur nyenyak-lah…. Zzzzzz….

For He never sleeps, He watches over my mom, you and me!!
Have a nice sleep, for God gives rest to His loved ones ;) ~Psalm 127:2b

7 reasons not to worry

The same God who created life in you can be trusted with the details in your life.
Matthew 6:25 That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn't life more than food, and your body more than clothing?

Worrying about the future hampers your effort for today.
6:26 Look at the birds. They don't plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren't you far more valuable to him than they are?

Worrying is more harmful than helpful.
6:27 Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

God does not ignore those who depend on Him.
6:28-30 And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don't work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are.And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

Worrying shows a lack of faith in and understanding of God.
6:31-32 So don't worry about these things, saying, 'What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.

Worrying keeps us from real challenges God wants us to pursue.
6:33 Seek the Kingdom of God* above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

Living one day at a time keeps us from being consumed with worry.
6:34 So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today.

(from Life Application Study Bible-NLT)

"I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid." - Jesus Christ -