i need you

Lord, I need to be with You right now..
You are the only one who knows me and truly understands what's actually going on with me.
I was reminded yesterday, that pride and insecurity is a sin.
Am I feeling insecure now? I don't know, but for what reasons, do I have things that people are jealous about? People would think that I got them all, but no.. I don't think so. Is it a part of me when I feel insecure, I am not sure.

I need to be with You alone, Lord.
I want to bow down and cry on Your feet. That's what I truly need.
It's not that I don't have a friend, I do have closed ones, but I just can't explain to them.

I need You, Lord.
I feel that I miss someone, but I can't tell him that I do.
I miss my college times. Really..
I want a chemistry.
I feel tortured checking on facebook, don't know why, it's silly, yet I still do it.
My life seems perfect, but what is this feeling I have inside?
My life seems as happy as others, but why I always think that others are better than mine? That's why it is torturing me checking on others' facebook.
The other part of me is shaking my head seeing this part of me.
So silly, so funny.. yet it's true. And it hurts me!

I need You, dear God.
I need You every morning, every noon, every evening... every time! always!
I need You to help me managing my time, my words, my thoughts, my mind, my money... everything within me.
I need You to manage my today, my tomorrow, my forever.
Dear God, I need You.. can't live a single second without You.

I need You..
and thank You for reminding me, that You are always here for me, You will be there for me too..

I need You and I love You.
You know, that I can't live without You..

Why are you downcast o my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise Him,
my Savior and my God.
Psalm 42:5

I will learn from Jesus, that He could tell everything to the Father, yet He believed that Father knew the best for Him.
From David, he struggled with his life, he sinned! Yet, God called him as a man after God's own heart.
I wonder, how David did that..
I want to walk with You, Lord, I can't do it without You.
Now, I realized that all my feeling are real, and You don't look down on them.
Though, I feel myself unworthy to have such feelings, but for You, I am the apple of Your eyes.
You never look down on me, Lord.
You care about my feelings.
You care that now I am struggling living my life to please You.
To stop sinning against You.
Not to be worried, anxious about my life.
I am struggling!
I am sad and devastated, that I fail so many times.
In fact, I failed today. I was so worried.. this anxiety was all over me.
Why could a very little single thing ruin my day? It's torturing.
But, yet, You care about it, Lord.
Though You know, that I know, I shouldn't be, but You still care.
You are here, helping me to wonder why.
Yeah... coz, actually, there's nothing wrong with me.
When I couldn't find a reason to give thanks to you ....
I just can give thanks for God is so good to me.
And You are faithful to me.
You care about me, Lord...

I need you.