what a day!

(from my fb notes, March 11th 2010)

i forced myself to sleep this morning (3am)...i thought i just couldn't handle my ------------- feeling anymore!
but, what could u expect from someone who feels ------------- and didn't have enough sleep to be better the next day and have a great day, huh?

as i've been longing for an encouragement from a friend, i got it from someone whom i expected the least!
we just had a normal talk - it had nothing to do with what i felt-. he sincerely asked me how i was.. and he started to share his story that later on i found it as a blessing.

i am still trying to manage all the ----------- thoughts and feelings inside me, but i figured out some stuffs today from the talking:

* there ain't such thing as a flawless family. though they are rich, respectable, perfect parents and kids.. there are still times when they were torn apart. we may not see it coz it's inside them, and of course perfectly covered.
it's not that i was encouraged for seeing others' family problems.. but I realized that there is nothing can guarantee a family to be free from problems. nor money. nor perfect and complete parents. nor great kids.
problems are out there. it's just how we handle them. how we put hope in our Lord to deal with them.
so, hang in there. we are called to bless our families. we will get through whatever circumstances we are facing.
"we can do all things with God who strengthens us."

* God doesn't give us an easy life. "don't take it wrongly". God wants us to fight for our lives. of course, we have privilege as His children -we have God fights for us-.
i remember Hebrews 12:
"My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. .............Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."
we got to have fighting spirits!! if we know what we want, fight for it. of course, seek first His kingdom and His righteousness. but, my point is .. if we want something, we got to fight! God didn't say it will be easy, but He promised He is there in every process.

* He keeps His promises that everyone who seeks, finds. He is our helper. He is our best friend.
i prayed.."Lord, i need to be encouraged. i am drained. i need a friend."
and yeah, He did it to me in a very unexpected way, He used an unexpected person to deliver His messages to me. today i found! and still.. He is my helper and my best friend. what a friend we have in Jesus!

* i always love these two quotes about "respect".
"Respect is wrapped up in the beautiful paper of kind and gentle words and tied with the enormous ribbons of a loving spirit." -carol ladd-
"An amazing thing happens when we begin to show respect to others. They begin to act respectable." -sharon jaynes-
so, try to respect others. people change. we might help others to change too if we start to respect them. we do them a favor. respect. respect. and respect. who we are anyway? good people? nooo! be respectable too!

* sincerely ask people "how they are" .. we will never know how that very simple sentence might touch others' lives. my friend did to me. God used him to fill up my day.
sincerely say "thank you" too. appreciate what people do to us. we are called to encourage each other. by thanking them, we tell them how much they are appreciated and we thank God for their presences.
Love never fails. love others and care about them sincerely, though they may not respond. seriously... love never fails.

so... i might still feel ------------------- but in a better way..
i feel like dancing and singing rite now... coz really ...
He turned my mourning into dancing again; He lifted my sorrow I can't stay silent, I must sing for His joy has come.
what a day!